Modern Gentlemen's Guide: Getting Caught

Getting Caught: If you get caught doing something (or someone) you're not supposed to be doing, never admit guilt. Never appeal to the captor's sense of reason. Make an argument to defend yourself that may or may not be reasonable and stick to it. Make it seem as though your captor is wrong no matter how right they may be. Convince them that black is white, up is down. In other words, intimidate and confuse to the point where you've gotten yourself out of trouble. If caught nude with another woman, there is no recourse but to arm yourself and guard your genitalia. If you think you may need to protect yourself from a rabid (now former) lover we suggest heading to London for the April 28th's Fine Modern and Vintage Sporting Guns Auction at Sotheby's. Personally, we are fans of the vintage J. Purdey & Sons guns on the block.
+Sotheby's Fine Modern and Vintage Sporting Guns Auction, April 28th, 2pm, Hammersmith Road, London.
+J. Purdey & Sons 57-58 South Audley Street, London.